The Problem With Sex Education

Sex Education

Sex education or sexuality education is the process of acquiring information and forming attitudes and beliefs about sex, sexual identity, relationships and intimacy. It is also a term used to describe education about human sexual anatomy, sexual reproduction, sexual intercourse, reproductive health, emotional relations and other aspects of human sexual behavior. It is generally accepted that young people have a right to be educated about sex. This is because while growing up, they may be exposed to a wide range of attitudes and beliefs in relation to sex and sexuality. Some of the information available to these young people may sometimes be contradictory and confusing. The media for one may promote the idea that being sexually active makes one mature and confident. And on the other hand, some health messages always hammer on the adverse effects of having sex such as contracting a sexually transmitted infection, unwanted pregnancies etc. These differing opinions may lead to confusion amongst the populace. Sex education should therefore entail finding out what young people know about sex, adding to their existing knowledge and correcting any misinformation they may have.

People get information about sex from different sources. It could be through the media, from friends, parents, schools and health institutions. It has formed part of the curricula in schools across the world. It is said to be formal or informal depending on its source. When the source is from a parent, friend, religious leader, from a casual conversation, or through the media, it is said to be informal. When offered by schools or health care providers it is referred to as formal.

Aims of Sex Education

The basic aim of sex education is to reduce the risks of the negative outcomes from risky sexual behavior. It is a means through which the youths learn and adopt the right attitudes towards sex. It aims to inform people about the dangers of risky sexual behaviors which may lead to unwanted teenage pregnancies, contraction of a sexually transmitted infection such as HIV among other complications. It helps the youth to have a positive mindset about sex and their sexuality. It helps to improve relationships between young people. It also empowers the youth against sexual abuses.

When Should Sex Education Begin?

Although it is generally accepted that young people have a right to learn about sex, it remains a controversial issue in several countries particularly with regards to the age at which children should start receiving such education. At what age would children be able to understand the concepts taught during sex education? Should it be delayed until people are sexually active before they are exposed to it? Or should it be taught to children in order for them to use the information later in life when they might really need it? When taught at an early age does it encourage young people to have sex? People are concerned that providing information about sex and sexuality arouses curiosity and can lead to sexual experimentation. Contrary to that, studies have shown that sexuality education did not increase sexual activity. It either reduced sexual activity, or increased rates of condom use. it should therefore be provided to young people before the age of puberty, and upwards before they establish their patterns of behavior. The precise age should depend on the physical, emotional and intellectual developments of the young people as well as their level of information.

The Curriculum of Sex Education

The issue of the amount of information that should be given to young people during sex education is still very controversial. Its content most times differs in schools across countries. Different people have their opinion and beliefs about sex, and this usually influences their willingness to accept sex education on the basis of the fact that what is taught might contradict their moral inclinations. For example, the Roman Catholic Church is strongly against the use of any form of artificial contraceptives. On the subject of sex education, Pope John Paul II in his Apostolic Exhortation titled Familiaris consortio, enjoined parents “to give their children a clear and delicate education” and that “if ideologies opposed to Christian faith are taught in schools, the family must join with other families and help the children not to depart from the faith.”

In India, attempts by state governments to introduce sex education as a compulsory part of school curriculum have often been met with harsh criticism by people who claim it is against Indian culture and would mislead children. In England and Wales, it is not compulsory in schools as parents can refuse to let their children take part in the lessons. In some countries, parents must give their consent before their children may attend such classes. These variations in different regions are believed to have arisen due to the lingering controversy over the curriculum of sex education.

A range of topics are usually treated in sex education lessons depending on the laws of the region. Some of these include:
The male and female reproductive system
Physical and emotional changes of adolescence
Growing up process
Dangers of sexual violence
Sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
Safe sex/use of condoms
Resisting peer pressure
Sexual abuse
Sex positions
Teenage pregnancies: among others.

Some people feel that sex education curricula breakdown pre-existing notions of modesty and encourage acceptance of practices that are immoral. Many religions teach that sex outside of marriage is immoral, and adherents prefer the abstinence-only sex education. For this reason, homosexual, bisexual, transgender youth, and those with other sexual orientations or practices which are considered immoral are often ignored in sex education classes. There is even lack of discussion about safer sex practices for manual, oral and anal sex with regards to the risks involved. Such practices are becoming more rampant among youths and many indulge in such acts believing that they are risk-free. The neglect of such delicate issues can end up causing harm to individuals affected. Sex education should therefore apply a non-judgmental approach in tackling such sensitive issues about sex. People providing sex education have attitudes and beliefs of their own about sex and sexuality but it is important that they do not let these influence negatively the sex education that they provide.

The Dangers of Revenge Sex and Other Stupid Relationship Mistakes

Relationships hurt sometimes. People always seem to provoke emotional pain in the ones they love. Unfortunately, as the importance of the relationship rises, so do their defenses against getting hurt or being abandoned, betrayed, misunderstood or unappreciated. For example, when you feel that your partner has mistreated you in some way, you often lash out in anger. This reaction is common-but unwise and potentially stupid. Let’s look at why people tend to respond with such anger, the dangers and what can help reign in hot-headedness.

Anger and Hurt

Anger and hurt are opposite sides of the same coin. If your past relationships and life with your parents and caregivers were emotionally harmful, then you might be more vulnerable to both deep feelings of hurt and anger when your partner upsets you by actions such as lying, withdrawing, yelling, ignoring, misinterpreting, cheating or being insensitive.

You might also be more susceptible to what is called the “fight or flight” response-your brain and body’s reaction to perceived threats such as loss of your partner’s love and the negative behaviors mentioned above. This “fight or flight” response occurs in the brain’s hypothalamus and pituitary glands, which contribute to a dramatic increase in the stress hormones cortisol and epinephrine. Your breathing and heart rate increase, you panic or feel sick to your stomach, and your anger becomes stronger than your ability to reason. If your family or caregivers used anger and abuse to express their emotions, then you might also have learned that these reactions are acceptable and expected.

The Dangers of the “Fight or Flight” Response:

Stress Triggers and Stupid and Dangerous Thoughts, Feelings and Actions

Stress Triggers. Many couples experience similar situations and stress triggers that provoke feelings of anger and revenge. The top relationship triggers include finding out your partner has cheated, lied, took off with your money or used money irresponsibly, got into trouble with the law, became addicted to pornography, criticized you, embarrassed you, hit you or the children, forgot your birthday or anniversary, was not supportive during your illness, got high or drunk too or was insensitive in general.

Many couples can survive these reactions, but sexual affairs seem to cut the deepest. They rob your feelings of trust, being loved and cared for, and they replace these important feelings with the gut-wrenching emotion of being abandoned. At least a third of couples do not recover from affairs-so they are also highly dangerous to the life of the marriage or relationship.

Stupid and Dangerous Thoughts, Feelings and Actions. All biological drives-sex, aggression, hunger, pleasure-have powerful grips on humans. When your partner cheats, the force of those biological urges can get the better of you-and one of the things that cheating provokes is a feeling of wanting to get even and punish the other spouse. It’s a bad case of “what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.” It’s an immature and hurtful act in response to being hurt.

Some partners run out and have affair “to get even.” Others, rather than have “revenge sex,” have “revenge spending.” For example, a man might run out and buy that boat he’s been wanting or a woman might go on an expensive shopping spree. One women marched into her husband’s closet and cut the sleeves off all his expensive suits when he complained about his wife’s clothing expenditures. He told her he didn’t know why a stay at home mother needed high-priced designer outfits.

These seemingly fun reactions serve the dual purpose of getting back at the other partner and also “filling that deep hole of hurt” in the partner who is hurt. But the satisfaction from these revenge acts is short-lived. Soon, the wronged person has opened an “emotional can of worms” in the relationship. The real danger occurs when these worms crawl so far away that they can’t be put back and forgotten. Now the couple is trapped in a domino affect of “You hurt me-I hurt you.” For instance, the woman who cut the sleeves off her husband’s suits was really reacting to feeling unimportant. She had temporarily suspended her career to raise the two children and no longer felt vital. Since she accompanied her husband to charity events, she felt she needed to “wow” the other people with her appearance.

Tips to Stop Anger Reactions

The first step is to make a list of all the reactions that you want to change about YOURSELF. Show it to your partner and ask him or her to make one about his/her reactions.

The second step is for each of you to tell the other what reaction you would prefer. Be very detailed. Imagine you are giving precise directions to actors on a stage. For example, if your partner was not supportive when you went to the hospital, don’t just say, “You weren’t there for me.” Your partner is likely to say, “What do you mean? I drove you there and sat right next to you.” Instead, say to your partner, “I need you to hold my hand and tell the nurse that you want to come in immediately to the recovery room.” Script the scene with actions and words.

The third step is to make a list of those totally unacceptable behaviors such as hitting. Tell your partner in advance that if these reactions occur, you will remove yourself quietly but quickly from the area. You might even need to develop a more elaborate “Protection Plan” such as have a safe place to go, keep 911 on your speed dial and have cash at a friend’s house.

The fourth step is to review your lists and rehearse them in your minds. The brain often does not know the difference between an imagined event and a real one. So, by rehearsing, imagining and saying your lines out loud, you begin to “train your brain” to develop new brain wiring that, over time, become stronger than your anger reactions.

The fifth step is to become more aware of your body reactions, thoughts and feelings when you do get angry. If you are experiencing a desire to “get even,” have “revenge sex,” harm your partner or say words that cannot easily be taken back, then try to catch yourself before you complete the dangerous behavior.

Develop “signals” to each other. For example, tell your partner to breathe or count to ten. Agree ahead of time which signals will not make the situation worse. When you are in company, for example, you might just nod your head at your head.

The last step is to examine yourself to find out the root of the reactions. The woman who cut off her husband’s suit sleeves realized that she needed adult company and adult accomplishments. She felt “cabin fever” from being at home with the children. She decided to become more active in charities. She also discussed a clothing budget with her husband-for his clothing as well as hers!

Remember that you can help reduce the domino affect of anger, revenge and hurt, but you cannot ultimately be responsible for your partner’s reactions. If you feel you are in danger, get professional help.

The Danger of an Untreated Yeast Infection and Other Gynecology Questions Answered

Even though there are a lot of resources available today, many women still have a lot of questions when it comes to common health issues. Actually, it’s not really their fault, there is so much information around today, and much of it is incorrect, that it’s very easy to get confused. Even so, it’s important to take control of your health and get the answers you need to any health related questions. This article is going to cover many women’s health issues including the dangers of an untreated yeast infection.

Of course, I don’t claim to be a doctor so make sure you discuss all of these issues with your doctor before you make any changes.

1. One thing you may not know is that birth control pills have been proven to be just as effective if you insert it directly into your vagina. This can be a God send to any woman who suffers from nausea when taking the pill.

2. Some women might actually be able to stop a migraine if they have sex. There is some evidence that suggests that about 20% of women may actually feel like having sex within a 24 hour period of getting a migraine, and that having sex may actually keep a migraine from developing.

3. Being on birth control may actually diminish your sex drive. This effect has been found in women who are on the pill both for contraceptive reasons as well as those who are taking the pill for hormonal reasons such as menopausal women.

4. It’s not impossible, just highly unlikely, for an untreated yeast infection to cause infertility or a serious condition. It can happen if the infection becomes severe or travels up your fallopian tube, but it is very rare and unlikely.

If you think that any of this information may be helpful, make sure to discuss it with your doctor. Just remember that you have to be your own health advocate, no one will be as concerned for your health as you are. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and keep asking them until you get an answer that is clear.